The Ridiculous Business Jargon Dictionary: R-words

Do you wonder where your co-workers picked up all the ridiculous things they say? From fresh-faced interns to top management, everyone drops one of these gems occasionally. We can only hope that you're not here to actually add buzzwords to your vocabulary.

Race without a finish line [n.]	A frantic effort without a clearly defined goal. "I see you clowns racing, but where's the damn finish line?" Suggested by Mark N.
Raft of measures [n.]	A group of solutions launched concurrently. "Let me assure you that we will float out a raft of measures to correct this imbalance." Suggested by Michael D.
Ramp up [v.]	To increase over a period of time.
Rasterbator [n.]	A person who uses photo-editing software compulsively.
RDB [n.]	Rectal DataBase. The origin of ideas that are pulled out of one's ass.
Re-inventing the wheel [v.]	Hard work that can be avoided by simply stealing the solution from someone else. "I will not abide wheel re-invention." Suggested by Julie.
Reach out [v.]	To contact. A dramatic way of saying a very mundane thing."I'll have my people reach out sometime next week." Suggested by Denis
Ready, fire, aim [exp.]	Releasing a product that isn't ready just to meet an arbitrary deadline or impress investors. "We'll fix it in post…" Suggested by Mr. Planner.
Real-time [adj.]	Distinguishes voice communication from email and text. "75 reply threads and you're nowhere. Get on the horn and deal with this in real-time." Suggested by Jeff.
Recontextualize [v.]	To redefine an organization's role in a given business environment. Who can actually say this word with a straight face??
Rectible [n.]	A larger, rectangle shaped cubicle usually given to team leaders. Suggested by Jeffrey.
Red flag [n.]	Warning sign.
Reduction in Force (RIF) [n.]	One of the many euphemisms used to describe firing people.
Referenceability [n.]	A measure of a firm's ability to gather positive references and case studies from its clients. Suggested by Lisa G.
Rent-a-quote [n.]	"Experts" for hire that are prized for their ability to provide convincing sound-bites.
Report [n.]	A subordinate. "By this time next year, you'll have a small army of direct reports."
Repurpose [v.]	To redefine how an item is used, often as an alternative to discarding it. "If we don't repurpose this production line, we're going to waste $2 million in capital."
Resonate [v.]	To appeal to someone on a fundamental level. "This new model will really resonate with the youth market."
Resource [n.]	References anything that will be used to complete a task, whether it be a stapler or a person. Usually helps managers strip away the humanity from their employees before making hard choices. Suggested by Renee.
Resource-intensive [adj.]	Expensive.
Responsibility curve [n.]	The collection of things for which one is responsible. "Accounts Receivable is not part of my responsibility curve." Suggested by Dave C.
Resume stain [n.]	A job (or company) that looks so terrible that you'd rather leave it off your resume.
Retired in place (RIP''ed) [adj.]	Describes a 'tenured' employee who still holds a position, but generally does nothing but count the days until retirement. Suggested by Mark D.
Retread [v.]	To implement a failed idea for the second time. Suggested by Matt F.
Reverse infallibility [exp.]	Describes a person who is always wrong. Suggested by Just Some Poor Schmuck
Reverse logistics [n.]	The return of a faulty product to the manufacturer. "Make sure the reverse logistics are as complicated as possible for the customer." Suggested by fhunktion.
Ride herd [v.]	From a cowboy expression meaning to observe and control closely. "Jill, I need you to ride heard on this project." Suggested by aclassicgirl.
Right seat on the bus [n.]	Responsibilities that complement the skills of those assigned. "We want to hire you, but just can't seem to find the right seat on the bus." Suggested by Jeremy.
Right-shoring [v.]	Distributing operations to the most profitable location, instead of assuming that offshore options are inherently superior. Suggested by Aaron D.
Right-sizing [v.]	A gentler way of saying downsizing (firing). Whatever you call it, you'll still be cleaning out your desk this afternoon.
Road map [n.]	A plan for dealing with upcoming business challenges. Your boss is probably just as lost when he's behind the wheel.
Robust dialog [n.]	A productive conversation between co-workers involving open, honest discussion. Usually this translates to two a**holes shouting at each other. Suggested by Christina.
Rocket surgery [n.]	A delightful way to combine two points of comparison when discussing the difficulty of a task. "Come on, it's not rocket surgery." Suggested by Jon K
Rocking a pair of doobs [v.]	Wearing boat/deck shoes (Dubarrys) in a business setting. Suggested by Chrissie.
Rocks in the backpack [n.]	The individual responsibilities that make up a person's total workload. "Can't help you. I've got enough rocks in my backpack." Suggested by Leah.
Roll in [v.]	When telling a story about a late coworker, this is the only acceptable way to describe their arrival.
Rolling the tortoise [v.]	Excessively increasing resources to accelerate an otherwise slow-moving project. "I'm pulling in ten extra bodies for this - we're really rolling the tortoise here..." Suggested by Nigel.
Rooster call [n.]	An early morning meeting scheduled well before normal working hours. Breakfast optional, but you best be brewing coffee. Suggested by Gene R.
Round file [n.]	The garbage pail. "This sales brochure is going straight into the round file."
Royal jelly [n.]	1) The substance that bees rub onto an immature female to cause her to transform into a queen. 2) The flashy projects and good assignments that are constantly fed to someone the boss is grooming for promotion. "Debra's been getting a ton of royal jelly lately, you think she'll remember us when she makes VP?" Suggested by Randy D.
Rub my rhubarb [exp.]	To be irritated in a particularly annoying or painful way. "These whiny new interns are really starting to rub my rhubarb." Suggested by Luke K.
Rubber check [n.]	A bounced check.
Rubber stamp [n.]	Approval. "Can I get your rubber stamp on this one?"
Rube Goldberg [adj.]	Describes an inefficient and overly complex solution.
Rug ranking [exp.]	When the career of an assistant is tied to that of his or her boss.
Run it up the flagpole [exp.]	To find out what colleagues think of a new idea. Suggested by Patti
Runway [n.]	The amount of time left before a project must 'get off the ground'. "You've got a 6 week runway -- don't waste it." Suggested by Tim C.

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