The Ridiculous Business Jargon Dictionary: F-words

Do you wonder where your co-workers picked up all the ridiculous things they say? From fresh-faced interns to top management, everyone drops one of these gems occasionally. We can only hope that you're not here to actually add buzzwords to your vocabulary.

f/u [n.]Shorthand for follow-up. Use with caution. "Make sure your whole team's prepared for the f/u."
Suggested by Cindy T.
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F2F [exp.]A really cute way of saying face-to-face.Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Face time [n.]1) The opportunity to sit down to discuss an issue in person. "I've been trying to get a little face time with the boss to go over this proposal, but she keeps blowing me off."
2) Unproductive time spent at the office meant to project the image that you're a hardworking employee.
Suggested by Randi H.
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Facipulate [v.]An unfortunate mix of 'facilitate' and 'manipulate', it refers to influencing the course of a discussion by indirectly promoting certain lines of thought.
Suggested by Ed T.
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Fact pattern [n.]A set of supporting evidence. "Mary keeps calling in sick on sales presentation days. Interesting fact pattern, don't you think?"
Suggested by Bob S.
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Fairy dust [n.]The finishing touches on a project. "Sprinkle the fairy dust on that one for me, will ya?"
Suggested by Steve B.
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Faker's dozen [n.]When someone calls out sick twelve times during a year, they've pulled off the "faker's dozen".
Suggested by Jordan M.
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Fall guy [n.]A scapegoat. After the buck is passed through the entire organization, it stops at this unfortunate person.Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Fallen angels [n.]Investments that once performed well but have declined in value.Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Faulty-tasking [v.]Taking on extra responsibilities to the point of being error-prone at one or all of them.
Suggested by Mad Casual.
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Featherbedding [v.]Keeping jobs that aren't needed in order to please the union.Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Feature creep [v.]The tendency to continually add more features during the development of a product.Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Feed the gorilla [v.]To ensure that the core part of a company is solid before trying more interesting or high-risk projects.
Suggested by Andy W.
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Feeding frenzy [n.]Intense buying by consumers. "They opened the doors at 12:01 am and kicked-off the feeding frenzy."Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Fenestration [n.]Windows. Please, please just say windows. "This 10th floor rental unit has excellent fenestration."Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
File thirteen [n.]The garbage can.Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Financial slack [n.]The cash buffer that sustains operations until more funding can be secured. "We're looking at 3 months slack till it all goes pear-shaped."
Suggested by Nate B.
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Finger in the wind [exp.]To reach a decision arbitrarily, with no clear rationale. "Don't put your finger in the wind and call it due diligence."
Suggested by Sinking ship
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Finger-of-blame [n.]An arbitrary method for selecting the person who will take responsibility for a mistake. The blame is usually way out of proportion with the actual error. "Uh-oh... the finger-of-blame finds ... YOU!"
Suggested by DJ.
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Fire away [exp.]Proceed whenever you're ready.Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Fire fighting [v.]Addressing a problem that must be solved immediately. "We've been fire fighting since last quarter's numbers were released."Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Firestarter [n.]Someone known for inventing/exaggerating problems, then calling countless meetings to find a solution and be the hero.
Suggested by fefe
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Fish or cut bait [exp.]To be forced to make a decision. "We're getting to the point where we have to either fish or cut bait on this one."Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Fishbowl [exp.]To be in the public spotlight.Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Fishing expedition [n.]1) A fact-finding mission.
2) A concerted effort to find something—anything—wrong.
Suggested by Vic P.
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Flavor of the month [n.]The most recent fad to hit Corporate America. Social-buying bubble, amirite?
Suggested by Dave.
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Flight risk [n.]An employee that is thought to be considering quitting.Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Flub [v.]To miss.Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Fluff it and fly it [v.]To make cosmetic improvements and then sell an item.Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Flunky [n.]A worker at the bottom of the corporate food chain.Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Flush [adj.]Possessing a large amount of money.Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Fly-tipper [n.]A manager who avoids confrontation by quietly dumping work on the desks of his subordinates when they're not around.
Suggested by Jon H.
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Flying a kite [v.]Initiating a project with no defined end point. Or starting point.
Suggested by B. Potter.
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Flying circus [n.]When company management takes a flight to inspect a local branch. "The flying circus will touch down tomorrow afternoon. Make sure we're ready for them."Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Followship [n.]The prized ability to obey direction without question. "Great followship leads to great leadership."Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Food chain [n.]An organization's hierarchy. "I'm going to send this up the food chain for approval."
Suggested by D Ochoa.
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Foot on the ball time [n.]Borrowed from football, this is a chance to pause and gain control of a situation. "If you don't give me a little more foot on the ball time, I'm going to blow this presentation."
Suggested by Sean.
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Foreseeable future [n.]A conveniently flexible period of upcoming time. Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Former life [n.]A clever way for speakers to refer to prior career positions. Often used by the speaker to highlight how far they've come in life. "In a former life, I sold insurance door-to-door."
Suggested by Sam M.
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Free cell [n.]An empty cubicle that was formerly inhabited by someone who played too many games of Free Cell.
Suggested by JC.
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Free lunch [n.]Something for nothing. Rare in the state of nature.Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Free seminar [n.]A sales presentation disguised as useful information.Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
From a _____ perspective [adj.]Three words of unnecessary padding around the subject at hand. "We're low on toner, from an office supplies perspective."Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Front burner [n., v.]The opposite of back burner, obviously. Reserved for the most pressing matters. "Frontburner your account outreach until we rollout."Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
FUBAR [adj.]F***ed Up Beyond All Repair.Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
FUD factor [n.]The amount of Fear, Uncertainty, and Doubt created in a customer during the sales process (which is then conveniently addressed by your product or service).
Suggested by David R.
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Full optics [n.]A complete view. "We don't have full optics on the situation presently."
Suggested by BT.
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Full-court press [n.]A term borrowed from basketball that's used to describe a maximum effort. "If we're going to regain our market share, we need a full-court press from your sales staff."Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter
Function [v.]To complete a task or action item. "Bob, make sure you function the inbox and delegate accordingly."
Suggested by kramtronix.
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Future-proof [adj.]A product that is claimed to be immune to obsolescence.Share this term on FacebookShare this term on Twitter