The Ridiculous Business Jargon Dictionary: A-words

Do you wonder where your co-workers picked up all the ridiculous things they say? From fresh-faced interns to top management, everyone drops one of these gems occasionally. We can only hope that you're not here to actually add buzzwords to your vocabulary.

Above-board [adj.]	Honest and open. "I don't think you're being totally above-board with me."
Aces in their places! [exp.]	When someone shouts this out, everyone runs to their station and leverages their core competency. Suggested by EC.
Acluistic [adj.]	Completely clueless.
Across the piece [exp.]	Affecting an entire project or organization. "We're aiming for efficiency improvements across the piece." Suggested by Clive N.
Action [v.]	To undertake a given task; to put into practice. "Don't bother me while I'm actioning my deliverables." Suggested by Ryan.
Action item [n.]	A short term goal that requires a defined measure of work to complete. Basically a dynamic, proactive version of your to do list.
Actionable [adj.]	Originally a legal word referring to anything that affords grounds for a lawsuit. In business speak, it's anything on which action can be taken.
Address [v.]	Used as a replacement for 'do', 'tackle', or 'complete', this word nicely avoids making a commitment to which the speaker can be held accountable. "I will address all of your concerns in the upcoming weeks." Suggested by Russel H.
Adhocracy [n.]	A minimally structured business where teams are formed as they are needed to address specific problems.
Admin [n.]	Political correctness beat brevity when Secretary became Administrative Assistant. Brevity is back. "Get on the horn with my Admin."
Administrivia [n.]	A term that encompasses all the trivial tasks that management is far too qualified to suffer through.
Adoption process [n.]	The customer's steps along the path from cautious cynic to submissive consumer of your product.
Aggressive mediocrity [n.]	A conscious effort to ensure that the bare minimum, and nothing more, is achieved. Suggested by SM Trkula
Agreeance [n.]	A fancier way of saying agreement. "Are we in agreeance?"
Air it out [v.]	To discuss an issue openly. "Let's get the team together and air it out this aft."
Al Desko [adj.]	Describes any meal eaten at an office desk (you have our sympathies if it's dinner). "I slept in so I'm having breakfast Al Desko."
ALAP [adj.]	As Late As Possible. Describes meeting a deadline at the last possible moment in order to avoid receiving additional work. "I finished it last week, but I'm going to submit it ALAP." Suggested by JC.
Alignment [n.]	Consensus. "Can we align on lunch orders?" Suggested by Josh
All-hands meeting [n.]	A mandatory meeting for all employees. "Bob called an all-hands this afternoon. Not a good sign when he's willing to freeze the whole department for an hour."
Alpha geek [n.]	The head of your company's IT department.
Alpha pup [n.]	Trendsetting young people. Important targets for marketing to this age group. "Get six alpha pups in here for a focus group."
Amped [adj.]	Having a large amount of excitement and energy. "I'm so amped about this new product line."
Anacronym [n.]	An acronym that is so old, no one remembers the original phrase. Examples include RADAR, ASCII, and SNAFU.
Anecgloat [n.]	A story designed to make the speaker look good. May be partly fictional.
Animal spirits [n.]	The irrational optimism that drives people to risk their life savings on a half-baked start-up idea.
Anointed [n.]	An employee that can't seem to do anything wrong in the eyes of management.
Anonymize [v.]	To make anonymous.
Anticipointment [n.]	The feeling that something didn't live up to its hype.
Appetite [n.]	Level of interest. "Don't spend another minute on this till you sample consumer appetite." Suggested by Otis
Apple polish [v.]	To suck-up, flatter.
Armchair general [n.]	Someone who speaks critically, but has no experience in the field in question.
Around [adv.]	Replaces 'about' with a softer, tangential approach. "We need to dialog around your choice of work attire." Suggested by Corinne F.
Arrows to fire [exp.]	Points to use in an argument. "Now if you don't have any more arrows to fire, I think we're finished here."
Ask [n.]	Used when the word 'request' is not quite cool enough. "Where do we stand on the latest client ask?" Suggested by John C.
Assignment capsule [n.]	A clearly defined job description or task. "Stop arguing about objectives and start handing out assignment capsules."
Assmosis [v.]	The apparent absorption of success that comes from sucking up.
At the end of the day [exp.]	The speaker would like you to know that he has a profound understanding about what is important and what is not. Suggested by Tom O.
At this juncture [exp.]	Now. "We're not prepared to go public at this juncture."
Availability [n.]	A convenient way of separating the individual from the ability to manage her own time. "I'd love to come, but I'm not sure about my availability, grandma." Suggested by Sam K.