I’m not going to sugarcoat it. Business people, you sound ridiculous.
An entire generation of white-collar workers have decided that it’s fully acceptable to say things like, “We provide a truly bespoke value-add, from concept to the coal face.”
The Ridiculous Business Jargon Dictionary was started in 2005 as a place to collect and document the outrageous expressions that have become so common in the working world. Since launching, it has grown to become the largest collection of business jargon online.
The corporate world is inventing terrible new jargon faster than we can document it, but your support will help us continue this important work. Pick up a copy today, supercheap!
- Over 1000 awful bits of business jargon spread out over 100+ pages
- An all new foreword about jargon and life by Matt Irwin, editor of the RBJD
- Digital PDF download. Delivery is instant, shipping is free, and sales tax is a very reasonable 0%
- Actually useful for non-native English speakers who never had to “bell the cat” or “grease the skids” in ESL class
What makes the perfect mortgage borrower?
Via: NYC Bankruptcy Lawyer
Here’s another infographic. This holiday party season, remember to get home safely.
Via: Burbank Personal Injury Lawyers
In honor of the arrival of cold and flu season (and the news that the flu shot might not help this year), we present:
Via: NYC Office Cleaner
Since the worldwide financial crisis started in 2009, a lot of pressure has been put on recent graduates seeking employment. This has led to a widening of the types of jobs and locations young professionals are exploring in order to find professional fulfillment. This new trend has given an interesting advantage to universities that focus on giving their students international experience while earning their degree.
In Europe, some private English-speaking universities have made this one of their core values. For example, European University, which is a higher education institution with campuses in Geneva, Montreux, Barcelona and Munich. The school also has a much wider international reach through partnerships, offering programs in places as remote as Malaysia, Kazakhstan, or China.
This one comes straight out of the jargon basement
for all you real jargonauts out there,
I’m waxing poetic with my warm bowl of nothing
on the back-of-the-envelope,
From the get-go I’m thinking outside the box
with my buzzworthy ideation,
Being not just human capital
but the Uber-Queen of the Pigs
doing the Muppet Shuffle,
Performing the bait and switch,
I’m the gatekeeper reinventing the wheel by
repurposing, recontextualizing and wordsmithing this resource,
Unpacking uptilting language not fit for purpose,
Enculturating the windowlickers,
It’ll probably be my resume stain,
My work of shame,
Ready, fire, aim:
So you suddenly find yourself with a burning attraction for that new addition to the Receivables department. You’re thinking, “Where’s the harm in asking her out? I’m sure we could keep things totally professional.” Well before you go down that road, there are definitely some things to keep in mind. Assuming she’s into it (watch that sexual harassment), this could either be a great match or the biggest mistake of your career.
The reality of the modern office is that people are working more hours and getting married later in life. This means that there are probably more singles of dating age at your office now than ever before. With more time spent at work, people also tend form social networks that get together outside the office walls. This situation creates an ideal setting for the full range of human attraction from copy room hook-ups, to trade show infidelity, to long term dating.